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Butterflies And Belly Aches

September 15th, 2009 · 13 Comments

Warning:  This post is a jumbled bunch of thoughts falling out of my head!

My two middle school children are keeping the school nurse busy.  They have been visiting her since the second day of school last week.  They’ve got belly aches and butterflies in the belly.  My train of thought – I feel guilty.  It must be my fault.  We didn’t do much of anything all summer.  Maybe if I had forced them to go to camp, to hang out with friends, whatever, they wouldn’t be having nerves now getting back into the swing of things.  As I’ve said before, I am shy.  My kids take after me in that way.  We love our stay at home time.  Sometimes I wonder if I was different and forced them into social situations from when they were little it would have been better for them.  But, then I think about myself and my childhood and realize that my mom was extremely outgoing and social and it didn’t take away my shyness one bit.  If anything, it simply increased the time that I felt unhappy.  Happily, they are good students and don’t have difficulty with their school work.  But, there is the stress of new classes, new teachers, different classmates than last year,  having one class on the first floor of one side of the building and the next class on the third floor of the complete opposite side of the building.  Which staircase is quicker, which hallway is less crowded, which pathway will get me there on time?

They have a 1 hour bus ride to school in the morning.  Not so good for when you have a belly ache.  The school is 10 minutes away.  Should I drive them?  I want them to keep riding the bus.  I feel guilty about that, too.

Getting this “I feel guilty” stuff out feels good!  Let’s see, what else do I feel guilty about?

  • I haven’t gotten my middle schoolers new lunchboxes for two years.  Their old ones are cruddy.
  • I can’t get my high school son to eat breakfast before school.  I can hardly get him to be awake before school! (He gets up just fine.  But is he really awake?!)
  • High school son needs new sneakers, badly.
  • All of them don’t like whole grain bread, and I don’t make them eat it.

Thank you for listening!  I really do feel better now!

In conclusion, go away belly aches and butterflies.  We’ve had enough of you for a while.

Butterfly 9-09 027 (Medium)

This one can stay.

Tags: Family

13 responses so far ↓

  • 1 Kimmie // Sep 15, 2009 at 12:56 pm

    My kids (and me too) sound a lot like you guys. We love hanging out together at home …. I guess the jitters just grow as they do – bigger school – bigger jitters. We’re still in the elementary school phase of things …. but my 6th grader wants to take melatonin at night (is that bad?) …. but she feels nervous about the next day. And to tell the truth – that’s the way I feel most of the time – “now I lay me down to sleep …. please let tomorrow be a good and safe day”

    I get it ….. and we have the same bread thing and I feel guilty about that too!
    .-= Kimmie´s last blog ..tea and fresh paint =-.

  • 2 Stephanie // Sep 15, 2009 at 2:06 pm

    I’m sure I came here with tons of insightful advice, but then I glanced over and saw your tweets and OH MY GOD you got TWILIGHT?!! Now I’m going to do the same thing I did when MichelleSG started reading it. Worry to death that you won’t like it. Whatever you do, don’t get your hopes too high. Just try to enjoy it for what it is: a teenage vampire love story.

    *nervously chewing fingernails*

    And I know I don’t know you in “real life” but from what I read here, you have nothing to feel guilty about. I think you are a great mom! Middle school and high school are rough, no matter what. Your kids will get through it. Especially when they have such supportive and loving parents to come home to.

  • 3 elk // Sep 15, 2009 at 2:13 pm

    you did not ask for opinions Gayle but here are my jumbled thoughts in the spirit of friendship…I think one hour bus ride each morning is long, if you drove them to school you could make it a happier transition…music, talking , time together etc. maybe that might help the nerves first thing in the morning…there is tension on a school bus …loud …uncomfortable …you could try driving them for a week and see how it goes.

    The stress of new things at school will even out as they feel more confident and the last four points …we all have them just a little different.
    blessings to you my friend …mothering, the hardest job there is!…great matching image!
    .-= elk´s last blog ..we shared =-.

  • 4 Shalet // Sep 15, 2009 at 4:07 pm

    Right there with you. Now that I’m back in town we are *trying* to get back into the swing of things. My kids didn’t go to bed until 11:00 last night. Not good. Not good at all. Tonight I have to work. Hopefully the hubby can set things straight. Somehow we’ll make it through!
    .-= Shalet´s last blog ..Guess where we are … =-.

  • 5 Katie in MA // Sep 15, 2009 at 4:23 pm

    I *love* this post! Just get it all out there! Throw it all out into the universe and then you won’t feel half so bad! Give yourself permission to let things be however you need them to be. You are a great mom and your kids love you and know they are loved. That’s a perfect score right there. Everything else will shake out. I mean, our moms probably worried over things and made (a few) shaky decisions and look how fabulous we are! :) Post it once a week, if you need to – air all the guilt out and it goes away.
    .-= Katie in MA´s last blog ..Do moms get One Freebie, too? =-.

  • 6 lailani // Sep 15, 2009 at 4:44 pm

    oooooh, wipe all that guilt away! I have a highschool son that will not eat breakfast before school. He takes after me, I could care less about eating in the morning. Those lunch boxes? Well I doubt the kids care and we are in a time of make do! The bus thing? If you can, (this is what I did) take them two days a week, Monday and Friday or Monday and Wednesday. All win, everyone can sleep an extra few minutes, their butterflys might go away (at least on those days) and who knows what wonderful teen insight you might get. Oh, the bread thingy? No one in our house likes the wheat, so white it is! hehe

    Smiles!
    .-= lailani´s last blog ..Memory Monday: Nobody Puts Baby In A Corner =-.

  • 7 Puna // Sep 15, 2009 at 5:25 pm

    Gayle, us moms certainly have the corner on guilt that’s for sure. Please take it easy on yourself! Perhaps to make you feel better, you can drive them for a couple of weeks. Then they will have a couple weeks getting used to school and you can feel better about yourself. It is a long ride…especially if they aren’t feeling well. Don’t worry about the whole grain bread. Teens will be resistence of any change when it comes to food. Trust me, I know. So, go get a pedicure Gayle.
    .-= Puna´s last blog ..September 15, The Best Medicine =-.

  • 8 mrs. e // Sep 15, 2009 at 5:30 pm

    No guilt. Lots of reassuring. Find the positives in every day–what they loved, what they learned, what good things happened. Remind them how wonderful they are. Fill their buckets with love–and they will be just fine! (Just like their mother is!!)
    .-= mrs. e´s last blog ..A Rose and a Thorn =-.

  • 9 RayeofSunshine // Sep 16, 2009 at 9:46 am

    An hour is a long time, especially for 10 minutes down the road. My high school was 10 minutes away and I spent 45 minutes on the bus. I was the first one picked up in the morning and the last one dropped off in the afternoon. Unfortunately I had no one to take me to and from school, so I had to waste an hour and a half of my day every day that could have been put to better use. I’d say try taking the kids to school for a week or two and see if anything changes. Best of luck! :)
    .-= RayeofSunshine´s last blog ..Monday Memories – The Second! =-.

  • 10 spread your wings // Sep 16, 2009 at 10:33 am

    i had a lot of those guilt feelings when taylor was young – am i doing the right things? now that she is on her own, i still have them – did i do the right things? certainly natural for mothers to feel.
    but it does seem to me the hour long bus ride could be stressful to young children. i bet they would love to have their mommy take them if it’s at all possible. hope only the pretty butterflies stay around.
    .-= spread your wings´s last blog ..uptight / excite =-.

  • 11 Gayle // Sep 16, 2009 at 12:36 pm

    Hi everybody!

    Thank you all so much for your support and thoughts and advice! I appreciate every bit of it!

  • 12 Timmy Has No Butterflies // Sep 16, 2009 at 1:19 pm

    […] ← Butterflies And Belly Aches […]

  • 13 christina // Sep 16, 2009 at 3:25 pm

    i want to say this, as gently as possible. please know, i send my words with love and light. the school bus ride, can be the culprit. it seems a little long and these bus rides can be the hardest on the tummy. in the past i had to lure my cousin off the school bus, because he feared his classroom, was like the bus ride.
    i send hugs and kisses to you. and kick that guilt in the rear, you don’t need it, around. : )
    xo
    .-= christina´s last blog ..in the moment deal =-.

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